The Heart and Mind

On Mother’s Day when I asked my nephew, who was nine years old and in the third grade at the time, what the closest distance between two hearts was, he first said a nanometer. This made me smile. He’s being scientific in determining the distance. Then I asked, not physical distance, but spiritual distance, and he said, love. He gave examples of relationships involving love: boyfriend, girlfriend, friend, mother, father, etc.

So, then I asked him if he was familiar with the concept of empathy. He said he had never heard the word before. He immediately went to the picture dictionary to better understand how to define empathy. The word empathy did not appear in his version of the dictionary. So, I asked him about God’s love and how powerful that was.

My nephew’s family is Orthodox Christian, so I tried to align with their values. My sister, his mother, would expect no less. I said is it possible that God loved us so much that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believe in Him will not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16)? Is it possible that God can empathize with us, because He took on human flesh?

What is empathy? I told my nephew that empathy is when you see from another person’s perspective. It can be thought-based or feeling-centered or action-oriented. I asked if empathy could be the shortest distance between two hearts. Without missing a beat, he said empathy means there is no distance between two hearts.

What a powerful perspective! What surprised me most was that my nephew compared the divinity of Christ to Greek myth. He said that there were plenty of examples of gods who became mortal. I think of Christianity as a monotheistic faith. The Trinity is the belief in one God, three persons. How to relay that to an elementary school student?

What makes Christianity a unique expression? A pastor I met years ago told me Christianity is the only religion with a risen Savior. The resurrection distinguishes Christ. His plan of salvation involved his death on the cross, his burial, his return to earth, and his physical ascension into heaven. My parents sent me to church while I was growing up and I paid attention during Sunday school, but I am still easily swayed. There are days I wake as a Christian, then pray as a Muslim or Jew. In Judaism and Christianity, our relationship to God is measured as a marriage covenant with believers as the bride.

My parents have been married for more than fifty years. I asked them what the shortest distance between two hearts was. My mom said, “Thoughts, feelings, and actions.” I was amazed at her discernment. It was as if she were privy to a classroom discussion in psychology. The idea that cognitive, emotional, and compassionate forms of empathy exist is rooted in the human experience. My mom should have taught counseling.

In the years to come, I’ll explore what minimizes the distance between hearts and what maximizes the experience of love and empathy.

In Islam, God does not appear in human form, but He is closer than our jugular vein, which connects the head and the heart.

According to the Indigo Girls, “the heart and the mind on a parallel course…Never the two shall meet.”

What connects our mind and heart with our actions? What aligns our humanity with divinity?

Join me on a journey to explore love and empathy.

Best,

Yeru